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A sexpert explains how to do it safely (the key word is balance!) and how to make it feel so, so good.

If you’re looking to add a standing position to your sexual repertoire, look no further than the ballet dancer sex position—a great place to start because it gives you clear instructions on what to do with your legs! “The person who is being penetrated lifts one leg and wraps it around their partner’s waist,” explains sex and intimacy coach Lori Beth Bisbey, PhD, a psychologist and accredited advanced GSRD (gender, sex, relationship diversity) therapist. See? Leg around waist. Easy! (If “easy” isn’t really your jam and you have a medic on speed dial, behold these standing 69 sex positions.)

“It’s a great change from the typical lying down positions,” says Bisbey, “and it’s a great position to be face-to-face in and enjoy the intimacy of eye-gazing during sex.” Like most standing positions, this one works best when you and your partner are of similar heights and/or your privates just happen to line up. “That can sometimes make it easier for there to be contact between pubic bone and clitoris, making orgasm easier while being penetrated,” she says. (Here are some ways, whether standing or not, to have orgasms more easily.) But even if you don’t have the optimal height situation, you can still get yourselves in the position with a little can-do spirit—and a sex swing. (See “The DIY Barre” below.)

Looking to make it extra steamy? Try accessorizing the position. “If you want to make it extra good, use a vibrating butt plug for anal stimulation,” says Bisbey. This works for both/either butts. “You can also try nipple clamps to heighten stimulation all over,” she says. Feel free to add vibrators, strap-ons, or whatever else you know does it for ya.

Do some stretches and give these a try. (Ballet tutu optional.)

Stand facing each other while the receiving partner hooks their leg around the other’s waist. Hold onto each other for balance, and if you feel a little shaky, lean against a counter or door jamb for extra stability. If one of you is an actual ballerina, deepen the penetration by lifting a leg up to the penetrating partner’s shoulder.

The ballet dancer position translates well into shower sex—just make sure you’ve got a safe set-up. That means sturdy handles to hold onto, waterproof toys, and preferably a non-slip mat. And don’t forget to glob on the silicone lube (in a twist of physics, water is oddly drying when it comes to sex).

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If you're different heights or just generally struggle with standing positions, we have a solution. Behold: the sex swing. (And before you freak out, a storage-friendly door-mounted model is less full-on sex room, aka way less intimidating.) You (or your partner) can sit in the seat or use a leg stirrup and the handles for balance. The person standing can rock the swing back and forth for bonus ~weightless~ motion.

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